Every time I have to mail off an important package, I go through this. What exactly this is it's hard to say... a combination of emotions and logic rattling around my brain and body. Mostly fear of being permanently labeled and destroying my good reputation I guess. This fear though is ridiculous. I have been successful so far and have every reason to trust that I am on the right track. Somehow though my fears kick in every time I mail off an audition request or competition entry package. At some point you would think it would dissipate. I think I care too much. But that is exactly what motivates my creativity and my art.
I sent off a packet yesterday and have 2 more to send today and a few more to send after that. Mailings are not my favorite thing in the world, but are a necessary evil. If only I weren't so invested, it wouldn't be a big deal every time. But then again, how intensely exciting it is every time I hear back a positive response! Which lately has been most of the time :) And like Ian said... "You get none of the jobs that you never apply for."
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